Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Twitter hits

I love Twitter so much ... it brings everything you want, right to you. Awesome!

Twitter hits from the last little bit:

Hockey hilarity


"If the had come out any flatter Tuesday night, Dustin Penner would have eaten them." XDDD *cryiiiing*


THIS GUY CASPER DOG FOOD FOR SENATORS HAS ONE OF THESE ลก THINGS IN HIS NAME, YOU KIDS, NEVER TRUST ANYONE WITH A SQUIGGLY LINE IN HIS NAME!


YKNOW I KNOW BOBBY ORR NEVER LET ANY POINT SHOTS DEFLECT OFF HIM INTO HIS OWN GOAL, CMON LIDDSTRIM
Celebs
AHHH! OH GOD I’M DYING! NOOO!!! I—oh, wait, I had a beet salad last night.




Took me 45 minutes of indecisiveness over what shade of brown before I realized, "You know what? I don't even need goddamn throw pillows."


Two guys in this bathroom are discussing the smell of the shit I'm taking. One says dirt weed. I'm sipping scotch and listening.

Betty White is a national treasure. Which is why Nic Cage is following an elaborate set of clues to find her.


I try not to tweet LOST stuff unless it's absolutely necessary. This? IS.
(link heads to How to Make a Peanut Butter Sandwich, by the Losties)



According to the tabloids in my dentist's waiting room we can expect a result in the OJ trial any day now.



Jeff, really, you're playing Vagina? : Up early doin press for my tour. Portland, Seattle, San Diego, Minneapolis & Vagina.
Even jokes about writing style guides

To stay hip, use "po-po" instead of "police" (e.g., Po-Po Anti-Drug Task Force, Chief of the Po-Po, INTERPO-PO.)


The adjective "hitlery" ("This hot dog tastes hitlery") should be confined to the editorial page.


"Tebowing" is not, in fact, the same as "teabagging." Though it is awfully close to "humblebragging."


SPORTSWIRE: NHL Accidentally Makes All Three Of Its African-American Players Work On MLK Day


Arby's Now Charging $2.99 To Let Customers Go Behind Counter, Grab Handfuls Of Roast Beef
Posted by at 9:00 AM

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